Mirror, Mirror on the Wall – Deniz Cansu

This is the exact street where I saw her for the very first time. At first she seemed like an other arrogant, pretty girl. She was walking like the streets were made just for her to walk on. Steady, strong steps, straighten posture with no sign of a rush. Nothing more interesting than an everyday princess. But then we got closer and closer. She was not looking straight with an urge to judge like others. She was looking up all the time. Like she was expecting something to appear out of thin air. And her looks were curious, not powerful.

We came across. Then she saw me. Smiled at me too. Not a smile that says “hello,” but a smile that shows she knows. My deepest secrets, my inner demons and everything that keeps me up all night. I felt mixture of emotions including excitement, fear, and misery. But if it is necessary to give more specific name to that feeling, I was afraid, and I should have been afraid. I should have looked away. But I didn’t. And something magical happened. She talked with a clear but a gentle voice. “Don’t be sad.” said she “you couldn’t have changed a thing.” And that was it. I was shocked, my mouth was hanging, my eyes were huge. But she had lost her interest on me already like she just did not say the one thing that I could never. She kept walking while the ghosts of the past were haunting me. The time stopped for me and I deeply sunk into my thoughts.

The time started to flow again. She was still walking. But I couldn’t move. So I did the only thing I could. I watched her go. But this time she looked nothing like her first impression. Or I didn’t. Because she looked like an ordinary girl. Not beautiful, not arrogant. Just like a girl. A girl who was trying to blend in among the beauties she kept seeing. And then I knew. It wasn’t arrogance, not at all. Streets were made for her, indeed, just for her to walk on because she wanted to be “the streets,” and everything above them.

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